Gabor AporJaneapor/Courtesy of family
Gabor Apor: Holocaust survivor. Father. Communicator. Sophisticate. Born Dec. 4, 1936 in Budapest; died Jan. 23, 2024, in Toronto, of Lewy body dementia; aged 87.
Gabor’s resilient, stubborn and positive nature, which was true to his Hungarian roots, defined him. He often joked that a Hungarian is someone who goes into a revolving door behind you and comes out in front. Even when faced with the horrors of the Holocaust as a young child, he chose to recollect the experience as an adventure rather than a time of fear. His quick wit, boundless creativity, effervescent opinions and fiercely loving heart left a lasting impression on everyone he met.
His photo hung on the wall at the Coffee Mill, a Hungarian café in Toronto where he enjoyed goulash and palacsinta for more than 50 years. Here he met Anne Winton; they fell in love, married and had a daughter, Jane. Although divorcing after 11 years of marriage, Gabor and Anne remained incredibly close. A typical Father’s Day would be celebrated as an expanded family that, by 1980, included Anne’s second husband and their daughter.
Gabor relished his routines: He had his favourite table at Harry’s Bar in Venice for New Year’s Eve and sent Jane a Sachertorte from Vienna for every birthday. He always drove BMW convertibles, listened to classical music or the CBC and was often spotted parking illegally, honking and waving at friends while driving.
He loved the feel of the sun on his face. His colleagues from his early advertising days recount how he used to go out to his convertible at lunchtime with a sun reflector to top up his tan. A trail of cigar smoke and European cologne would follow Gabor from the hallways of agencies in New York and Toronto to the streets of Old Havana, which he loved and frequented. He even assumed the role of communications strategist during the historic visit of Pope John Paul II to Havana.
It was hard to get a word in edgewise. He often interrupted people, eager to share interesting insights from the six newspapers he read before 6 a.m. You could hear his alluring voice, infectious laugh and thunderous sneeze from a mile away. Yet he knew when to be silent. Gabor evaded the Nazis, hiding and living in a Wallenberg safe house in Budapest until Hungary was liberated in 1945.
He left Budapest during the Hungarian Revolution of 1956 to start a new life in Canada with just $10 sewn into his coat. His thick Hungarian accent never faded and, despite difficulties with English pronouns, he went on to advise politicians such as Pierre Trudeau and David Peterson on communication strategies.
Gabor was a fabulous storyteller, which helped him produce and direct more than 3,000 commercials and television shows, many award-winning. He was also a great guest at any dinner party.
He loved reminiscing about the night Jane was born in New York, when he paced a hospital corridor with Francis Ford Coppola, talking about film, production, camera angles – even helping film the birth of Coppola’s daughter, Sofia.
He was proud to be a Canadian and believed there was no better country in the world in which to live. In 2006, he was chosen as one of 50 Hungarian Canadians to be featured in the National Portrait Gallery in Ottawa, commemorating the 50th anniversary of Hungary’s independence.
Once voted one of the sexiest men in Toronto, Gabor had impeccable taste and style. He had suits custom-made by a local Italian tailor, loved a good sale and bought things in multiples.
In 2019, he was diagnosed with Lewy body dementia. He rarely complained, adjusted to new realities and bounced back repeatedly from complex health issues. He was affectionately nicknamed “the Hungarian Tank” by family, friends, doctors and caregivers.
He held firm to his motto, “If you can’t imagine the possibilities, you might as well give up.” Fiercely independent and resolutely optimistic, he lived this for as long as he could.
Jane Apor is Gabor Apor’s daughter.
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