THE QUESTION
An ex-employee has asked me to be a reference and write a recommendation on their LinkedIn profile. But I don’t have great things to say about their performance. It was never enough to get fired (they resigned) but they never seemed to be enthusiastic about working and always did the bare minimum. I don’t want to interfere with their ability to find work somewhere new, but it feels dishonest to give a good recommendation or to turn down the request. What should I do?
THE FIRST ANSWER
John Pettifor, head of talent acquisition, Traction on Demand, Vancouver, B.C.
Like everything in life, responding with honesty and respect is important when addressing this type of request. If it appears that an ex-employee didn’t understand that they weren’t meeting expectations during their time with your company, this is a great opportunity to help them understand this.
It’s important to reply with an honest and supportive rhetoric, clearly explaining that you do not wish to be a reference or that you’re not comfortable providing a recommendation. I would use this dialogue as an opportunity to explain your reasoning, perhaps stating that during their tenure, you didn’t see performance or results that you would endorse. This is also a good time to let them know that you’d be happy to further discuss what you did see, and help coach them through your examples as a learning opportunity.
Hopefully, they’ll take you up on this and you’ll be able to get reacquainted so that you’re able to deliver this feedback in an objective and fair manner. For maximum effectiveness, I always recommend writing the feedback down and providing coaching opportunities, links, articles, etc., so that you can deliver this information succinctly and effectively.
THE SECOND ANSWER
Yvonne Ruke Akpoveta, change management strategist and advisor, OliveBlue and the Change Leadership, Toronto, Ont.
This can often be a tricky situation, but you have a couple of options here.
One, you can choose to act as a reference, but not write a LinkedIn recommendation. A reference is different from a recommendation. A reference at the minimum is a formality check to confirm the person worked in the said organization. A recommendation is often a few steps further to say you endorse and can vouch for them.
Two, you can choose to do neither, and provide them feedback on why. Taking this decision would be a courageous act of leadership. By choosing to take this route, they may feel upset initially, but in the long run, this could be valuable feedback for their career development and growth. As well, in the course of the conversation, you may learn more about why they acted in that manner.
Should you choose to provide a reference or recommendation, this does not need to be dishonest. What you must separate in your mind at this point, is your expectation versus reality.
Because they did not seem enthusiastic about working or did not go above and beyond the standard requirements of their job, that may not mean they didn’t perform well. If we extend some empathy, it could be that there are circumstances in their lives that could have prevented them from showing up the way you expected.
What you can choose to do, if you decide to provide a reference or recommendation, is to find a silver lining in what they did well and how they delivered on their work at “the bare minimum.”
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