This is the weekly Amplify newsletter, where you can be inspired and challenged by the voices, opinions and insights of women at The Globe and Mail.
Sandra E. Martin is head of newsroom development at The Globe and Mail.
After two decades of colouring my hair – dating back to experiments with henna and highlights in my 20s – four years ago I decided I was done. My grey had proliferated to the point where I could barely keep up with root touch-ups, and while creative parting helped to mask regrowth at the top of my head, I discovered no truly effective way to hide the sparkle that appeared in my “sideburns” just days after dyeing.
Sandra E. Martin.Fred Lum
I’d mused about going grey before, but had always been heartily discouraged, until switching stylists. “You really don’t want to do that,” was the response from my previous two (male) stylists. The subtext was that transitioning to my natural colour would make me look less than my best. The new stylist was a woman, and she was super supportive of my plan. “We can do that gracefully,” she said, explaining how she’d add highlights around my hairline for the grey roots to blend into.
I’ve been thinking about all this as we’re learning that the silver strands of Lisa LaFlamme, the longtime CTV news anchor who grew out her grey during the pandemic, may have had some influence on her recent ouster. How many women have hesitated to grow out their grey – or, having embraced it early in the pandemic, have gone back to colouring their hair – not because that’s their personal preference, but because they worry about being judged as “too old” on the job, now that many employees are being recalled to their offices in greater numbers?
While I enjoy the extra time and money that not colouring my hair has freed up, I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t seem as though people look at me differently now. Sometimes the reactions are positive, and sometimes they’re … less positive. Earlier this summer, while I was waiting for the streetcar, another woman walking by chimed, “Your hair is so pretty!” That was a lovely surprise. At other times, I have felt not so much judged as rendered invisible. For example, staff in clothing stores tend not to greet me, although I notice them greeting other shoppers. Baristas seem to have more trouble hearing my order (which is hilarious because anyone who knows me will tell you that vocal projection is not one of my weak points). Other grey-haired women in my peer group have reported the same.
Comments like “Wow, you’re so brave!” fall somewhere in between. What does that even mean? I stopped colouring my hair – nothing on par with running into a burning building or treating infectious diseases. It gives me the same slight cringe as the collective surprise and admiration that rose out of Alexandra Grant and Keanu Reeves’ first big public appearance as a couple. Grant, an artist, began going grey in her 20s, and now in her late 40s, rocks an edgily elegant silver bob. Was it her hair, or the lack of a significant age gap between the two (unlike, say, Leonardo DiCaprio and … anyone he dates) that struck many of us as extraordinary?
On the career front, women experience more ageism in the workplace, and “they experience it at earlier ages than men,” Ellie Berger, the author of Ageism at Work: Deconstructing Age and Gender in the Discriminating Labour Market, told The Globe in this article. A number of women she spoke to for a study “said they were getting first interviews but, ‘When the employer sees me, I would never get called back.’”
Women’s concerns about grey hair derailing a job search are widespread enough that LinkedIn has devoted more than a couple of articles to the topic. One touts “How to Make Grey Hair a Competitive Advantage on LinkedIn.” Another shares how one Samsung marketing executive has embraced a “grey hair, don’t care” attitude.
I interviewed virtually for my current role here at The Globe. And while I’m aware that my hair looks noticeably less grey on video calls (I’ve inherited my mother’s dark-at-the-very-front-grey-at-the-sides hair colour pattern), I’ve never bothered to obscure my age by deleting my university graduating year or other telltale benchmarks from my resume, so I presume my boss has always had a very good idea of how old I am.
In any case, I have a new staff headshot, courtesy of the kind and talented Globe photographer Fred Lum. So I’m hoping that my age, and my grey, don’t come as a surprise (or a disappointment) to anyone.
What else we’re thinking about:
This week, Martha Stewart, the so-called doyenne of domesticity, serial entrepreneur and 420-friendly pal of Snoop Dogg welcomed the first guests to her first restaurant. And while I have to say I’m puzzled by the decision to offer tableside smashed potatoes (scroll down for a video), Stewart’s tirelessness at age 81 is making me rethink my own plans for retirement.
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